Yesterday at Faith Harbor United Methodist Church in Surf City, North Carolina, my dear wife, Carrie, and I enjoyed the service. The Children’s Sermon was a preview of what Mr. Vaughn was going to share with us, the Parable of the Vineyard Workers. The lady giving the children’s sermon was doing a good job. Given there was one little jasper there interrupting her with a comment every third word, I think she performed a miracle.
She conveyed the parable quite well and at one point one of the kids said: “So you get thirty dollars and he gets thirty dollars and I get thirty dollars even though you worked longer”.
The kid made me laugh out loud.
I immediately hearkened back to our youngest son, Cody, and some of the shenanigans he used come up with while taking the English Language to its literal limits.
Don’t ask me how many years ago these incidents were. I know that the last I will share happened in the Summer of 1996.
As I mentioned, Cody was a literal sort when it came to his interpreting the English Language as a young lad. The following are such examples:
I was holding down the couch on a Saturday afternoon. I had one eye on the pillow and one eye on the Atlanta Braves playing…someone. Cody was in and out of every door to our house at the time…two…with such repetitive speed I wondered how he could be in two places at once. On one pass through the living room, the baseball announcer made the comment that it would be a good idea to think about stealing home. Cody looked at me and asked why anyone would want to steal their home?
Cody and I were driving down the road and the radio was tuned to a classic rock radio station. Nazareth’s “Love Hurts” was blaring through the speakers. That song has a guitar solo that can still tickle my spine all these years later. Anyway…Cody looked at me and said, “That song reminds me of you and Mommy….Love Birds.”
I suppose it was a television news story. A guy on the television was talking about how a Military person was being given a Purple Heart. Cody stopped in his tracks, looked at me, and asked…”Why would anyone want a purple heart? They are supposed to be red.”
My all-time favorite Codyism came the Summer of 1996. Carrie was taking a class at Indiana University in Bloomington that summer. It was a one week intensive class. She was at it from 8 AM to 5 PM. The boys and I were piddling around while she was taking the class.
One day we hit the jack-pot. IU’s Memorial Stadium has an open door and we had a football. Jarrett and Cody and I started throwing passes to each other. Cody soon got tired of the football tossing and he proceeded to run up and down the West Stands of Memorial Stadium…all 109 rows of it. He would disappear for a minute and you could hear him hoot and holler inside the bowels of the stadium. In a minute he would reappear and yell at Jarrett and me on the field.
During this time I was showing Jarrett where I saw Rick Leach and Michigan in 1975. I showed him where Anthony Thompson leaped for a touchdown against Kentucky in 1988. I showed him where Ray Griffin returned a mammoth interception for Ohio State. I was in my glory and Jarrett knew it. We had a great time.
Cody came running back down to the field and he was red-faced and worn out from all the steps he had taken throughout the structure that is Indiana’s Memorial Stadium.
Cody looked at me, caught his breath, spit on the ground, and said something that I will never forget. Here I was showing Jarrett all these great memories from my childhood and Cody says:
“Man, this would be a great place to play hide and go seek!”
I treasure that day.
Speaking the rights.
Danny Johnson